In this article we address the “Just Choose Better, Bro” fallacy that a more ‘perfect’ man can avoid divorce.
Index
- Just Choose Better, Bro
- The Fallacy
- Nobody Gets Married Expecting to Get Divorced
- But My Parents Have Been Married for 50 Years!
- Historical Limitations of Your Wife’s Options
- The Rise of Widespread Female Infidelity
- “Just Be Alpha, Bro” – The High-Value Man Fallacy
- “Just Find Jesus, Bro” – The Christ Pill Fallacy
- Divorce Court – Judge Gives A Reality Check – The Law Isn’t Fair
- Corruption of Incentives & Removal of Consequences
- Sticking It Out, For Better or Worse
- Will ‘The Cautionary Tale’ Smith
- It’s Not Much Better Over in India Either
- Keeping Her Happy Forever
- Tom Leykis – The Reality of the Relationship Lifecycle
- That Beaten Dog Look
- Conclusion
- References
- YouTube
Just Choose Better, Bro
“Just Choose Your Wife More Carefully, bro”
“Just be a Better Husband, bro”
There is common “Just Choose Better” fallacy that a more ‘perfect’ man could somehow choose his wife more carefully or keep his wife happy to avoid divorce or infidelity for decades. Or perhaps he didn’t fuck her well enough. Groan. Really?
This seems especially prevalent among two groups of men:
- Clueless young men who have less experience with women
- 50+ men whose wives were too old so they missed the era of smartphones and dating apps in their prime years for the opportunity to cheat on him with genetic alpha males (or who cheated the old fashioned way without digital traces so didn’t get caught)
The next time someone gives you the equivalent of “Just Be A Better Husband, Bro”, or “Just Choose Your Wife More Carefully, Bro” send them this article.
The Fallacy
A marriage lasting for decades until “death do us part” relies on both parties maintaining it, not filing for divorce and not cheating.
But you cannot control your wife’s actions.
Young women today have so many easy options to cheat with hotter guys any day they want it, and no legal repercussions under feminist law.
Good men get cheated on every single day.
People also change over the course of years and decades.
“The nice girl you marry is not the same woman who divorce rapes you”
Women file 70-80% of divorces because they take 50-75% of the assets, plus ongoing alimony and child support on top. She can then use your house and money to fuck as many hot guys as she wants. Corruption of Incentives much?
It’s not up to you if you get divorced or cheated on.
Nobody Gets Married Expecting to Get Divorced
The “Just Choose Better” bros also show a lack of intellectual rigor because they haven’t applied the most basic logic to the scenario.
A few men may have chosen poorly, yes.
But when the number of divorced men is in the millions, with many countless men citing having been cheated on by women, something more systemic is at play.
They haven’t stopped to think that those millions of divorced men had often dated their wives for years before marrying them. There was enough physical chemistry and attraction for them to go through the effort and expense of marrying her. And they had years to consider if this was a safe choice. Most men have built up relationship trust over years before risking marriage. They did not expect for things to change or to end up divorced.
Divorce courts are littered with broken men who thought their girl was different.
But My Parents Have Been Married for 50 Years!
Yes, because they got married 50 years ago when it was a different world.
Tom Leykis, the OG of the red pill, an extremely experienced man, summed this up well.
His parents were married for decades, so after his first divorce he assumed it was his fault – the “Just Choose Better, Bro” fallacy.
So he tried again, and again, and again.
After 4 divorces, hitting different problems each time – such as being cheated on, or having women change the terms of the relationship after marriage, or reneg on parental planning – he came to the conclusion that it’s unlikely to work in the modern age.
There are simply too many things that can and do go wrong today.
This is borne out in statistics – most relationships fail over time, and most marriages fail over time.
Historical Limitations of Your Wife’s Options
The level of opportunity and temptation for your wife to cheat on you with genetic alpha males was very rare historically.
It was bounded by physical limitations of your immediate social circle, work colleagues and local community. This meant that if you were in reasonable shape and reasonably successful, you were the best she could do, which afforded you some level of protection.
In today’s globalized sexual marketplace with social media and dating apps, the number of genetic alpha males that can send her brain haywire are unlimited on tap a mere few swipes away on her smartphone.
It’s as easy as ordering a pizza.
When her friends and colleagues entertain her with stories of their sexual experiences, she will eventually get ‘fear of missing out’.
Her social circle will have normalized promiscuity and infidelity.
The Rise of Widespread Female Infidelity
“Rings don’t plug holes” – Tom Leykis
Being married does not lock down a woman sexually. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
53% of women have admitted to cheating in a “prior” relationship. And those are just the ones who admitted it. There is a strong bias towards women never admitting infidelity, both for security and social reputation reasons.
68% of women say they would have an affair if they knew they wouldn’t get caught.
Infidelity is the number one cause of relationship breakups around the world.
Women say that men are dogs, yet women now cheat at similar rates to men, and those are old statistics. It’s almost certainly much worse among the newer Tinder generations where the balance of power has shifted massively in favour of women with far greater sexual access and unprecedented physical hypergamy.
If you find out and try to divorce her, she’ll still take your house, kids, alimony and child support.
If you slap her, she’ll call the police and you’ll go to jail.
You have no recourse at all under feminist law if – or more likely when – she cheats on you.
“Just Be Alpha, Bro” – The High-Value Man Fallacy
For those who think that they just need to become ‘High-Value Males’ to solve this problem, they should read the reality of what has already happened to better men to disabuse them of this fallacy:
This one is a true story from a long-term friend of mine and one of the best guys I know anywhere:
Other guys have their own examples:
“Just Find Jesus, Bro” – The Christ Pill Fallacy
Religion can’t save you from divorce either. Millions of christian women have divorced their husbands. Even those who are on the stronger end of the ‘Christ Pill’:
Divorce Court – Judge Gives A Reality Check – The Law Isn’t Fair
The below is a true story of an actual dialogue from a divorce court.
Husband: “How can you let her take half my stuff when I’m the one divorcing her for cheating on me?!”
Judge: “It’s irrelevant, she’s still entitled by law – and it won’t just be half.”
dialogue from a divorce court
Men mistakenly believe that if she breaks her marriage vows of monogamy by fucking other guys, that he will get some kind of moral advantage in court for being the good one, that will lessen his financial damage. Alas, this is not true.
Feminists have thought about this and protected women’s financial claims in advance explicitly in cases of being caught and divorced for adultery.
This is contrary to common sense and a clear break of the traditional social contract that marriage was supposed to be.
This is an unintended consequence of universal suffrage. Women are the majority of the population so control the majority vote and subsequently the laws. Feminists are criminals by the standards of human history, because they legalized their social crimes like adultery and paternity fraud.
And not just legalized, but legally protected physically by police enforcing new domestic laws favoring them, and also manipulated the divorce laws to protect their financial claims.
She loses nothing if caught, you lose everything as the man.
Corruption of Incentives & Removal of Consequences
Humans are driven by incentives, and the incentives today are for her to cheat on her husband and / or divorce him.
The reason for this is because there’s always a hotter guy with better genetics, only a few swipes away on her phone at any time.
It’s especially dangerous when she comes off the pill and her hormones change from favouring Beta Males to favouring Alpha Males, or once she gives birth to a child and her reproductive urges are fired up, as the benefit to her in evolutionary terms to cuckold her husband to have better genetics for more children is so high. I’ve seen this in real life more than once in just my personal social circle.
The 7 Year Itch 11 (more like 7-15 years in my experience) is a well-known observation that relationship satisfaction declines around this time. It appears that there is a biological basis found in both humans and animals to break up after getting the children through the hardest early years.
Historically, women who cheated could be financially disowned or even killed.
Today without this counter-balance, it’s more like not a question of “if”, but rather “when” and with how many guys, and no she will not wear a condom with the guy she really fancies, because her evolutionary biology doesn’t want her to. This is why 1/3 of kids tested do not belong to the husband or boyfriend.
Sticking It Out, For Better or Worse
I know many men who are unhappily married who cannot afford to divorce their wives.
When you factor in that following ‘successful’ marriages:
- sexless
- wife cheated on the husband
- husband’s just riding out the clock, buying himself in his work
- they’re staying together for the kids
- husband can’t afford to divorce his wife
It’s clear that most marriages, even those that technically avoid divorce, are failures by what men truly wanted out of them – ie. a faithful wife and regular supply of sex and respect to meet his basic needs.
Will ‘The Cautionary Tale’ Smith
Will Smith was by all accounts an Alpha Male – tall, muscular, good looking, successful, rich and famous.
And yet even Will Smith is a shell of a disgraced man due to his ‘successful’ marriage to Jada Pinkett Smith.
Unless you’re happy becoming a disgraced beta male with no self-respect to stay in such a marriage where she’s repeatedly cuckolding you while using you for your resources, then you may have no choice but to file for divorce yourself. Most men don’t want to become like Will Smith, sticking it out in an unhappy marriage because he’d lose too much in the divorce.
Staying married isn’t a flex when you’re a cuck.
Even 50 Cent couldn’t believe the interview and posted their private texts.
Will Smith refused to divorce Jada Pinkett Smith after she admitted to cheating on him, among several other embarrassments. This later boiled over to the Oscars where a trivial unrelated joke made by Chris Rock resulted in Will Smith walking up and slapping Chris Rock in the face, resulting in him getting banned from all Academy events for 10 years.
He slapped Chris Rock because he couldn’t slap that bitch Jada Pinkett Smith.
This was a clear venting of the emotional damage that Will Smith was taking by staying in that marriage.
It’s Not Much Better Over in India Either
Even supposedly more traditional asian societies are now running into significant relationship problems similar to the West. They may be a little behind the curve of feminist decline, but that’s all.
See The Myth of Traditional Foreign Women.
Keeping Her Happy Forever
Millions of men thought they could keep a woman happy forever only to find out that it’s not realistic today.
Tom Leykis – The Reality of the Relationship Lifecycle
Every guy needs to see this – chilling.
When Tom Leykis talks you remember why he’s The OG of the Red Pill above all others.
No RP guy around today is on his level in depth of experience.
The Relationship Lifecycle explained perfectly – feeling & truth only a lived guy can give.
That Beaten Dog Look
Conclusion
So whether you’re regularly browbeaten and face Betatization via a Thousand Concessions, or getting straight-up cucked, it’s very difficult to stay in a marriage with a modern feminist woman today.
The perfect man to modern women seems to be one that gives her all of his financial resources and turns a blind eye to her fucking other guys when she decides to go on a “Girl’s Night Out” or trip home to visit the family, or works it into a spare hour alibi in her weekly schedule.
And that’s if she isn’t one of those women who decides to pull the grenade pin on you – the ones who file 70-80% of divorces to check out with “cash & prizes” to use to fuck around with the endless stream of hot and ready guys on Tinder, in your house.
Staying married is really outside your control and even when doing so can be psychologically very unhealthy for a man today.
Just like an Oscar statue, he often has no balls left.
References
- https://nypost.com/2022/08/23/women-are-more-likely-to-cheat-than-men-heres-why/ ↩︎
- https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-6211153/The-rise-female-infidelity.html ↩︎
- https://www.brides.com/reasons-women-cheat-in-relationships-1103341 ↩︎
- https://www.reddit.com/r/adultery/ ↩︎
- https://www.reddit.com/r/Infidelity/comments/10dezns/the_radultery_sub_being_more_popular_than_this/ ↩︎
- https://hackspirit.com/i-ruined-my-marriage-by-cheating/ ↩︎
- https://www.lovetoknow.com/life/relationships/rates-divorce-adultery-infidelity ↩︎
- https://relationshipsadvice.co/cheating-statistics/ ↩︎
- https://www.perspectivesoftroy.com/2020/10/07/do-men-cheat-more-often-than-women/ ↩︎
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TUxH2izTGI ↩︎
- https://health.clevelandclinic.org/seven-year-itch/ ↩︎
