Leykis 101 – Dating Rules

Leykis 101 – Dating Rules

Leykis 101 was dating advice on the popular Tom Leykis radio show in California – everything revolves around the shortest path to getting to sex. The mantra was:

“Dating Equals Porking”

This avoids letting women exploit you as a nice guy for free dinners and attention without giving you sex. Dating coach Alan Roger Currie wrote a book called No Free Attention 10 years later on that same issue.

Much of modern dating knowledge can be traced back to the Tom Leykis show. Essential learning with countless caller in examples on a wide range of topics and stages of the relationship lifecycle.

Tom Leykis

Tom Leykis was a radio jock talk show legend and OG of men’s dating advice.

He was very experienced with women, having grown up poor and had sex young at 13, married by 18, with his first divorce at 21, becoming a millionaire, married and divorced 4 times over, then later became a strictly casual serial dater, giving him greater overall depth of experience than any other current dating coaches.

His call-in radio talk show was very popular in California in the 2000s and was 10-15 years ahead of its time in Tom’s understanding of women’s lack of loyalty and attitude of entitlement, before the rest of us learnt this the hard way in the age of social media & dating apps and before the current plethora of authors and experts on this emerged in the 2010s.

Tom understood women’s nature of hypergamy early through experience rather than facts, and leveraged his money and minor celebrity status to get laid when his looks shouldn’t have worked.

He was often called “The Professor” or “Dad” because he was the father to many men who called in for advice, sharing his many personal experiences to explain women’s nature. He was a master debater and a cunning linguist.

His show was much deeper and richer in experience than current podcasts of ‘making hoes look dumb’ by newer generations of guys who have less experience of the complete relationship lifecycle.

The episodes dedicated to women haters calling in complaining their boyfriends were refusing to marry them after listening to his show were particularly entertaining.

Tom is also the source of the acronym DTB – Dump That Bitch.

Tom Leykis Show and Leykis 101 on YouTube

Some favorite episodes are listed further down in the Selection of His Best Shows section onwards.

YouTube channels containing episodes of his show are listed in the Best YouTube Channels post:

Leykis 101 – Dating Rules

  1. Don’t be a Nice Guy – you want to be the Jerk / Asshole that gets laid and that she complains to the nice guys about that she doesn’t have sex with
  2. “Dating = Porking”
    • The point of a date is to get laid – not to have conversations, or see movies or drink coffee at Starbucks or have lunch with strangers…
    • Never ever go out with a chick if “porking” is not a possibility – such as if she suggests you have coffee or lunch or anything where you see here in the light of day where there is no chance of having sex
  3. Don’t spend more than $40 dollars on a date, zero is optimal (not including travel, this might need to be $80 now due to inflation)
    • spend at little as possible – it doesn’t matter how much you spend, she either wants to have sex with you or not
    • spending more money has the opposite effect – she feels like you’re pressuring her to have sex, she feels like you’re attitude is if you spent enough money she’ll put out. It makes her less likely to put out, less likely to give you what you want because she feels anxiety about it
    • if you spend nothing on her, she thinks this guy is confident, this guy’s got balls, this guy thinks I’m gonna sleep with him, then the dark side kicks in, maybe he doesn’t think I’m that hot, maybe he doesn’t think I’m that special, why won’t he spend any money on me, is something wrong with me, not spending money is very effective
  4. No Dinner Dates – bypass them by asking her “What time do you have dinner?”. She will say around 7-8pm, then say “Great, meet me at the bar around 9-10pm and we can grab a drink”
  5. 3 Dates Rules – don’t meet up a 4th time if you didn’t get laid, she can come to your place at night
  6. The Bait & Switch – Sex is a lure women use to trick men into marrying them or getting them pregnant to trap them, then the sex dries up
  7. No Marriage
    • divorce – if you must get married get a prenup
    • women kill your sex life once they get that ring
  8. No Cohabitation
    • common-law divorce risk
    • it’s hard to get rid of them
    • women kill your sex life
    • women make you pay for everything
  9. Don’t Date Single Mothers
    • They’re a waste of time and money, will downgrade your life
    • They have reduced availability
    • You’ll always come last
    • If she gets pregnant, she will keep the baby and you will pay 18 years of child support
  10. Do not impregnate women
    • Always use condoms and also insist she uses female contraception to be safe
      • beware her poking holes in the your condoms
      • women who don’t use female contraception want to have a baby to trap you
    • Get a Visectomy and don’t tell her
      • if she gets pregnant then you know she’s a cheater – DTB
      • freeze your sperm so you can be in control of who you have children with later
  11. The Hail Mary – convince her to have an abortion – if birth control + condom both fail, your last ditch play to avoid a kid is as follows:
    • tell her you love her and you want to do this right
    • tell her you want to finish studying / building your career, then get married (you won’t, chill) and that then you’ll have children the right way way with more money
    • you sell her the future dream – contingent on her having an abortion now
    • you then arrange the abortion clinic for the first morning slot and take her there yourself before she has time to change her mind or talk to anyone else
    • afterwards you take her for a McMuffin at McDonalds (it’s a tradition and signals she’s been Leykis’d)
    • then you never call her again so she never gets another chance to get pregnant again
  12. American society is based on the man transferring his wealth to the woman
    • we now have the stats to prove this – women account for 80% of consumer spending, despite not earning anywhere near half
  13. Do not give women money
    • No expensive gifts
    • Do not pay their car payments
    • Never pay for her plastic surgery , she is not doing it for you anyway
    • no marriage, no cohabitation, no having children and 18 years of child support – there’s no prenup for child support
  14. Avoid saying “I Love You” as much as possible as she will relax, put in weight, less sex, etc.
  15. If you must buy her a cheap cubic zirconia “promise ring” instead of marriage
    • if she loves you, she’ll never figure out the ring you gave her is a cubic zirconia, because she’ll never take it in to get valued. If she does she’s just exposed herself to be a gold digger!
  16. Don’t tell her what to do – just tell her you don’t date women who go to the club or have male friends etc.
  17. Men and Women Can’t Be Friends – if a woman has a male straight best friend he has already fucked her or will when times get tough in your relationship
  18. Don’t approach women in packs, she won’t go home with you because she’ll be slut shamed by her friends
  19. Don’t buy drinks for her friends
  20. Do not take strippers seriously
  21. Dating is War:
    • her purpose is to be a sperm depository
    • she wants you to pay for everything
    • you want to get laid
    • women use sex as a loss leader to get you in the door and fleece you later while reducing the sex – you can beat this by not committing – smart men take the sports cars out for test drives to enjoy them without buying the cars
  22. Monday – Wednesday are for initial dating, Thursday – Sunday are for guaranteed lays only
  23. If she is on her phone during the date then get up and leave
    • If she cell phone rings on a date night out, that’s likely either her babysitter because she’s a single mother or it’s another man she’s dating – either way DTB
    • “Oh, it’s so noisy here, I’m gonna go outside for a minute to take this call” – means she’s juggling men and does want to talk to another guy in front of you. Walk out and DTB
    • If she goes to the bathroom for a long duration of time on a date get up and leave, because she’s probably on the phone to another guy
  24. Tell the bar tender “easy on the sauce“ when they make your drinks so you don’t get a DUI when you drive to her place to have sex
  25. Always be trawling for new women – she might flake, might run into an ex-boyfriend, always have 2, 3, 4 possibilities in play at all times
  26. No food stops after drinking – if she asks she’s doing a filibuster to avoid having sex with you that night. Drop her off to get food and go home.
  27. The Light of Day Rule – how to know she wants to date you seriously:
    • she wants to see you during in the light of day eg. for coffee or lunch
    • she wants to see you on the weekend for a picnic
    • after you’ve had sex with her she wants to see you in the light of day for breakfast, brunch, visiting her family, visiting your family. visiting relatives, visiting your friends, visiting her friends etc.
    • she wants to be at your place on holidays
    • if you want to see her for just sex you don’t want to see her face in the light of day – you want to ensure she has enough to drink, or whatever other chemical inducements she would be taking with her own consent (weed works too if it’s legal where you are).
  28. Divorce before 10 years to avoid lifelong alimony:
    • Always do an “eight year gut check” and if there’s any chance your marriage won’t make it long term then divorce her to avoid paying lifelong alimony aka “vaginamony” (vagina money – money paid after divorce for prior use of her vagina)
  29. Prenups – do it with separate lawyers before a wedding date is set and video record the prenup, get a retired judge record the interaction with her consent , she needs her lawyer present also, to avoid her saying she signed under duress
  30. Wine is for rich people – learn about wine
  31. Go to a rich lounge and watch and learn how the rich men interact and what they wear. Mimic them
  32. Women don’t want you to become too much more successful because then you could leave them for someone younger and hotter
    • PsycHacks further down came to the same conclusion 15 years later
  33. During a Date – MEN: SHUT UP
    • the more you reveal about yourself the less likely she is to put out
    • the trick to getting laid is to let her blab incessantly. Make it look like you care, make the appropriate noises as she blathers on incessantly. Let her talk about her family, her politics, her whatever
    • give up as little information as possible about yourself. Because you have one goal and one goal only – to have sex with her – and you don’t want to do anything that is going to f that up.
    • don’t let her stay at your place all night – the last think you want is to wake up in the morning and her say “Why don’t we go to brunch”. You definitely don’t want that. No brunches, no breakfasts, no Starbucks. None of that. Do not see her in the light of day.
    • If she says why don’t you talk much, reply “You’re not used to a guy who listens” 😉

Are Women Gold Diggers?

“Those that can do.
The attractive women you want, they’re gold diggers.
The overweight round faced girls who people say are a nice person, they’re not gold diggers, because they can’t, they’ve got nothing to sell”

Tom Leykis

US Marriage Rates Fall As Men Avoid Feminists – Liars, Cheaters and Divorce

I worked up and down California in the early 2010s when I got “picked up” at a sushi bar in LA by an English woman living there. She told me the marriage market was dead there, that men dated but didn’t want to commit. I didn’t know Tom Leykis at that time, but he was popular and had been busy spreading the word against marriage and the feminist divorce laws.

This was an invaluable resource that we didn’t get in Europe. I’ve poured over hundreds of hours of his radio show to bring you the highlights as concisely as possible to save you time.

Tom is the proof that you can get laid without looks if you have money and minor celebrity status. He routinely self-declared himself a minus one on the 10 point scale to takes away women’s first weapon of “you’re ugly!”.

The fall in marriage rates became so pronounced by the 2010s in government statistics that Helen Smith PhD published a book in 2013 called Men On Strike detailing the falling marriage rates and the feminist causes behind them.

Marriage is now at the lowest level ever since records began in 1862 in the UK and US.

Tom Leykis saving men from the predatory feminist marriage & divorce industry almost certainly contributed to this decline in marriage as he was easily one of the first men helping to wake men up.

Intro to Tom Leykis

Northwest Afternoon Leykis (circa 2000)
Northwest Afternoon Leykis (circa 2000) – CraigTalks

Funny Caller Stories

There are countless great stories from callers in to the show.

One guy bought a 2nd hand stretched Limo with a stocked bar for dates, got his friend to dress as the schauffeur, invited the “driver” back for a little party. They alternated roles on different dates as the “rich” guy.

Cheap way to status up and get laid more using women’s hypergamy against them like the Tinder Swindler! Genius!

Selection of His Best Shows

There are literally a thousand+ episodes of Tom Leykis on YouTube on different channels, so a selection of memorable ones are presented below if you’re short on time:

Tom Leykis Best Motivational Speech – Tom Leykis

Tom Leykis – The Reality of the Relationship Lifecycle

Every guy needs to see this – chilling.

When Tom Leykis talks you remember why he’s The OG of the Red Pill above all others.

No RP guy around today is on his level in depth of experience.

The Relationship Lifecycle explained perfectly – feeling & truth only a lived guy can give.

A MGTOW Wedding Video (featuring Professor Tom Leykis)
A MGTOW Wedding Video (featuring Professor Tom Leykis) – C.P. Becker

Leykis 101 – Dating Advice

Essential Edition – Tom Leykis – essentials of Leykis 101
Static Intellect – Tom Leykis – Leykis 101 episode
The Shortest Distance Between Two Points
The Shortest Distance Between Two Points – Tom Leykis – Leykis 101 episode
Information & Influence
Information & Influence – Tom Leykis – Leykis 101 episode
Tom Leykis Leykis 101 Leykis 2008 09 11
Tom Leykis Leykis 101 2008 09 11 – Lotanna Lakew
Tom Leykis Leykis 101
Tom Leykis Leykis 101 – Lotanna Lakew
Rules of Leykis 101 #98
Rules of Leykis 101 – Tom Leykis

Marriage, Divorce & Relationships

Tom breaks down of the infamous article by Lori Gottlieb of The Case for Settling for Mr Good Enough – don’t be that guy who gets settled for because she’s ageing out at 30 and wants to get married,. That guys later cheated on or divorce raped:

Former Sluts & Marriage Desperation
Former Sluts & Marriage Desperation – Tom Leykis
Mr Good Enough – Tom Leykis
Defiance & Disaster
Defiance & Disaster – Tom Leykis – defy Tom’s wisdom and get burnt by women
The $et Up – Tom Leykis
Decepticons – Tom Leykis
Whore’s Night Out – Tom Leykis – girl’s night out is cheating 101, if she does this “Dump That Bitch”
When Girls Are Out of Town
When Girls are Out of Town – Tom Leykis – women go on trips to cheat, hear shocking confessions from women’s own mouths
Used Tech To Catch Cheating
Used Tech to Catch Cheating – Tom Leykis
Tom Leykis Bad Boys Vs Marrying Kind Leykis 20
Bad Boys vs Marrying Kind – Tom Leykis
Expiration Daters – Tom Leykis
Sloppy Seconds – Tom Leykis
The Greatest Letter Ever Written
The Greatest Letter Ever Written – Tom Leykis – letter from a married guy – why not to get married
Avoid The Fatal Flaws
Avoid The Fatal Flaws – Tom Leykis – avoid marriage – Tom debates a woman pressuring her boyfriend to marry her, and a twist surprise comes up…
Deceptive Illusionists
Deceptive Illusionists – Tom Leykis – women change after marriage
It’s a Trap! – Tom Leykis – the trap of cohabitation and women’s expectations to your money
Turned Tom's Info Against Men
Turned Tom’s Info Against Men – Tom Leykis – women listening to Tom and used his advice against men!
Fairy Tales – Tom Leykis – the importance of looks, problem with “intelligent” women, and unrealistic expectations
Irrelevant Intellectuals
Irrelevant Intellectuals – Tom Leykis – the pitfalls of “intelligent” women
Married Prisoner – Tom Leykis
Divorce Is Priceless
Divorce is Priceless – Tom Leykis
The Common Trend – Tom Leykis – women marry Mr Reliable then cheat or leave the boring good father
Denial & Acceptance
Denial & Acceptance – Tom Leykys – because yours is a special love that nobody has ever seen before 😂
Do Not Pay Their Debts
Do Not Pay Their Debts – Tom Leykis – when you marry someone in debt, that debt becomes your debt
Tortured Souls & Bitter Bitches
Tortured Souls & Bitter Bitches – Tom Leykis
Black Holes – Tom Leykis – single mothers
Single Moms Dating
Single Moms Dating – Tom Leykis
Your Girlfriend's Kids
Your Girlfriend’s Kids – Tom Leykis
Tom Leykis Settle For Mr Good Enough 2 Leykis
Tom Leykis Settle for Mr Good Enough 2 Leykis – Lotanna Lakew
Never Be Nice To Her
Never Be Nice To Her – Tom Leykis
Never Say I Love You
Never Say I Love You – Tom Leykis – your sex life will decline
Never Change For Her
Never Change For Her – Tom Leykis
Fat Fallacies – Tom Leykis – a woman getting fat or no longer giving sex is breaking the relationship rules – “Dump That Bitch”
The Definitive Doctrine
The Definitive Doctrine – Tom Leykis
Sentimentality Course
Sentimentality Course – Tom Leykis
Silence Speaks Volumes
Silence Speaks Volumes – Tom Leykis
Corresponding Characteristics
Corresponding Characteristics – Tom Leykis – the danger of her friends to her behavior and your relationship
Ego & Control – Tom Leykis
Paternity Percentages
Paternity Percentages – Tom Leykis – paternity fraud 1/3 kids tests don’t belong to the husband / boyfriend! Everybody needs to test their children because women are hoes
Sluts Fear DNA Tests
Sluts Fear DNA Tests – Tom Leykis
The Legendary Professor
The Legendary Professor – Tom Leykis
Tag! You’re It! – Tom Leykis – 1/2 wives surveyed regret marrying their husbands, 3/4 fantasize about other men and 2/5 constantly flirt with other men
Nothing is Free – Tom Leykis – women expect to be paid for the relationship or housework upon divorce
A Message For All Wives
A Message For All Wives – Tom Leykis – tips for women to keep their marriage
When Hot Girls Hit The Wall
When Hot Girls Hit The Wall – Tom Leykis – how women look for relationships once they’re old after fucking all the other men
Booze In, Genitalia Out
Booze In, Genitalia Out – Tom Leykis – Leykis 101 episode
Women Deserve Less
Women Deserve Less – Tom Leykis – debunking the Gender Pay Gap with Warren Farrell PhD
Women Earn Less – Tom Leykis – more Gender Pay Gap debunking
Women Are Not Independant
Women Are Not Independent – Tom Leykis
Women Use Sex As Loss Leader
Women Use Sex As a Loss Leader – Tom Leykis – the bait & switch to get men’s resources
Women Stay Hot As Bait For Marriage
Women Stay Hot As Bait For Marriage – Tom Leykis – women are healthier without marriage because they can’t afford to get fat
Women Want Richer Men
Women Want Richer Men – Tom Leykis – describes hypergamy & references David Buss PhD
Marriage Security – Tom Leykis – women pretend to be on good behavior until they get married
Stuck In A Dead End Marriage
Stuck in a Dead End Marriage – Tom Leykis

Tom Leykis – You Just Don’t Know How Successful You Will Be In Future

Tom Leykis – you just don’t know how successful you will be in life yet – don’t get married or let women get their claws into you via pregnancy, alter your trajectory to provide for them, and kill your dreams
Tom Leykis The Godfather of MGTOW - Red Pill Moment
Tom Leykis The Godfather of MGTOW – Red Pill Moment – Prime Generation

Tom Leykis in Old Age

Tom Leykis "Do Not Marry Women"
Tom Leykis “Do Not Marry Women” – Streaming Legends with PJ

New Kids On The Block Learning The Same Lessons 15 Years Later

The most DANGEROUS thing for a RELATIONSHIP: why success is harder than failure
The most Dangerous thing for a Relationship: why success is harder than failure – PsycHacks


One major caveat is that Tom is pro-abortion and encourages promiscuity in both men and women in their younger years before settling down and advises against having kids young to build a career instead, reinforcing many feminist traps and failures of modern society.

However, this is merely a reaction to the feminist laws screwing men via divorce courts and child support, and was before the scale of the birth rate crash was discovered, although Tom’s personal philosophy was that propping up society was not your problem as an individual.

Tom stopped one step short of trying to fix society because in those days we didn’t know that women’s voting majority under universal suffrage due to higher male mortality rates is the reason for all those feminist divorce and child support laws.

Tom was one of the original MGTOW men who started the widespread marriage boycott we now see across the West.

Tom Leykis: A Hard Look At His Philosophy ©

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